All posts by Jason Hughes

Motivator, reader, writer, gym addict, victim advocate, husband, father, and human.

Being a Man = Not a Free Pass

Just because you have the title of: male, man, or guy, it does not give you the right to talk down to others; especially women! 

  • It doesn’t matter how much money you make in comparison to them. 
  • It doesn’t matter what type of occupation you hold.
  • It doesn’t matter how you were raised.

Those examples are just excuses! When a man yells, insults, and talks down to a woman, all they do is demonstrate their insecurities. (The same goes for when they do this to other men, too.) Trust me, when a man acts this way, other men and women recognize it even if that particular man believes that his actions are justifiable. 

The inflection in your voice does not validate your opinion.

It’s time that we show women (and men) respect because that’s someone’s daughter, sister, mother, and friend and they wouldn’t like it if the shoe were on the other foot.

I am Going to Win Today

Repeat after me – “I am going to win today!” You need to get to a point in your life where people that don’t like you, they don’t even bother you anymore because you’re too busy staying focused on what you’re trying to do in life. A winning attitude produces winning results.

You are who you are today because of the choices that you’ve made and if you’re going to get somewhere else, you’re going to have to change something.

Hard Work – Fitness Lifestyle

There is no magic pill, no magic body wrap, and no magic supplement that will ever replace hard work and discipline in the gym and at the dinner table. Yes, vitamins, pre-workout supplements, and post-workout supplements are incredibly important (especially if they’re the correct ones that support your goals); however, they still don’t replace the work. 

Please, don’t be fooled by what you read and see on the internet; especially via YouTube. This is a business world and people are always going to try and persuade you to try something new. That’s perfectly ok; that’s how you discover new things. But again, that will never replace hard work. Stay focused, remember your goals and conquer them!

Stop Embracing Excuses

You will never be considered a mature adult until you are capable of taking total responsibility of all of your choices; good or bad, stop blaming others, stop blaming the so called system, and stop expecting others to fix your mistakes.

You cannot ever expect to move forward if you continue to allow your mistakes or shortfalls to hold you back. If it’s difficult, so what? If other people don’t approve, so what? If you make mistakes, so what? Stop thriving on what you did wrong and start demonstrating the actions that will correct the situation. Make the decision.

Mothers: The Worlds Forgotten Heroes

On January 30, 2000 at the Georgia Dome in Atlanta, Georgia, Kurt Warner of the St. Louis Rams (now LA Rams) hoisted the Vince Lombardy trophy over his head after winning Super Bowl XXXIV. The State of Missouri was filled with joy and labeled QB Kurt Warner as a hero. Throughout the United States of America, Soldiers from all branches of service return from deployments in support of Operation Iraqi Freedom (OIF) and Operation Enduring Freedom (OEF). Medals and promotions were addressed to those that had earned their right to have them pinned upon their chest. Just like Kurt Warner, they were labeled heroes. These are two different scenarios that define two completely different types of heroes. But in the end, they are both viewed as someone we should look up to; heroes.

At the same time in a small, beyond repairable apartment in Boston a single mother makes dinner for her 5 year old son after working 12 hours and earning only minimum wage. On the inside she is feeling defeated and embarrassed to face her family and friends. But on the outside, the side that her 5 year old son views everyday regardless of the circumstances, she is happy and full of life. She emits an amazing ray of light that says “No matter what we go through, I will be there for you son and you will never go without.” Despite how she feels on the inside, her son doesn’t notice due to her phenomenal level of compensation.

After evaluating all of the astonishing things this mother does for her son, at the end of the day there is no Vince Lombardy trophy hoisted above her head. There are no medals pinned on her chest for her heroic deeds. There is no standing ovation or even as much as a, “Good job mom.” No, the only thing this single mother gets is a new day to repeat the same processes.

Our society complains on a daily bases about not getting the recognition that we believe we deserve. Yet, there are so many heroic events happening around us without our knowledge because we are complacent. You as the reader may know this person; at least you should be familiar with them since they have already done so much for you and your siblings. They have a fancy title for her, they call her mom. Does she ring a bell? She should.

Mom is the one that carried you for 9 months when you were incapable of supporting yourself yet. Mom is the one that helped you grow when dad was too busy or was away at work. Mom is the one that told you it was going to be okay even though she knew deep down inside that it really wasn’t that easy and it would take some time. Does mom ring a bell now?

As an avid sports fanatic I have considered many of my favorite athlete’s heroes. In fact, being a fan of the St. Louis Rams (now LA Rams) I too labeled Kurt Warner as a hero. But now that I am older and wiser, I now realize I have forgotten the most important person that I have failed to acknowledge; my mother. Every mother on this planet regardless if they are rich, poor, or even famous are heroes. Yes there are some mothers that do not deserve such a title but I can assure you, the ones that do outweigh the few that do not. This doesn’t mean we have to present them with trophies and medals because I can assure you, those things do not mean a lot to them. In fact, I am willing to bet it is twice as special when she gets to see you being awarded these things.

So what does this mean? What should you do? Perhaps you should start off with something small like, “Thank you mom. Thank you for being there for me when no one else was there. Thank you for helping me grow-up to be the person that I am today. More importantly, thanks for being my mom.”

The world is full of people like Kurt Warner and honorable Soldiers that deserve to be called heroes. But none of these are more deserving than Mothers: The Worlds Forgotten Heroes. To leave these special and unique individuals out of the equation would simply be a tragedy. On behalf of all sons and daughters of the world, I would like to take this moment to say, “Thank you mothers of the world. You truly are heroes.”

Make Things Happen

TODAY is the day that you make the decision to stop dreaming and start doing. It is pointless for you to sit around dreaming about what you could be doing tomorrow, next week, 1 month from now, or even 2 years from now when you have an entire day in front of you! 

“People are always blaming their circumstances for what they are. I don’t believe in circumstances. The people who get on in this world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want, and if they can’t find them, make them.” – George Bernard Shaw

One Suicide is One too Many

There have been way too many suicides and acts of suicidal ideologies in our school systems here lately. Yet, we are still hearing and reading cruel comments from people such as: 

  • “They were weak!”
  •  They’re a coward!”
  • That’s one less person that I have to worry about.” 
  • “If someone wants to hurt themselves than that’s their right.”

Really? That person was someone’s brother, sister, daughter, son, friend, etc. What if you knew them? Are they still weak? It’s hard to rationalize it that way when the situation is personal, right?

You are never alone.

Race, color or creed – none of that matters when you are talking about suicide. You don’t have to know someone to feel the impact of suicide. That ripple effect carries much further than you realize.

The ripple effect and your circle of influence.

What you can do is join the fight to help save everyone from making this mistake. Suicide Intervention starts with YOU carrying about the welfare of others even if they are a complete stranger to you. Please, I beg you, help make a difference and save someone’s brother or sister. One suicide is one too many. 

A Real Conversation

With today’s technology and amount of distractions that we have around us (examples: smart phones, iPad, etc), we seldom have “real” and meaningful conversations.

Did he forget that I’m still here?
Interesting conversation…

The world would be a much better place if we actually listened to each other and used effective communication.

Are you disciplined enough to put your phone away during these types of scenarios?

Killing Me Softly With His Words

Many men use power against women to compensate for perceived threats to their status as the man in the family. Abuse of power comes from the entitlement and privilege men feel in relation to women. The vast majority of physical and sexual abuse is perpetrated by men while verbal and emotional abuse can go in both directions. 

A typical male abuser:

  • Has feelings of inadequacy.
  • Believes strongly that there is a “right” way for men and women to act. 
  • Is unable to express feelings verbally. 
  • Feels his happiness and support are dependent on his partner.
  • Fears rejection and abandonment.
  • Is jealous or is overly possessive. 
  • Is moody, depressed and/or angry most of the time.
  • Feels that personal wants, needs and desires come first.
  • Witnessed abuse between parents or was a victim of parental abuse.